Wow-- boldly and confidently undersweet in a way that accentuates the cocoa flavor and maintains its indulgently creamy demeanor throughout. Tastes like nothing I've had before, and after 1,650 chocolate milks-- that's saying something!
New Pond Farm Chocolate Milk
The darker, slightly more mature cocoa flavor is uniquely indulgent and further accentuated by the graceful undersweetness, which makes this feel noticeably more desserty and sophisticated than your average ham-fisted over-sweet mass-produced chocolate milk. There's a bit of a dusty footprint on the back end, a conscious reminder of what it takes to deliver strong cocoa flavor in a dairy base.
Indian Creek Creamery Chocolate Milk
Velvety creamline body with a gorgeous salty lick at the end which puts a bow on each and every rewarding sip. Chocolaty, warmly creamy-- it's got 'soul' that is not often understood until tried. Delicious from start to finish, this will have you asking incredulously why anyone ever decided to homogenize milk.
Martin's Reduced Fat Chocolate Milk
If you're not familiar with the uvular 'twang' that you can get from a strongly high-fructose-corn-syrup-sweetened chocolate milk, then give this a try and you'll know. It's devoid of anything other than a sticky sweetness, and is the dairy equivalent of watching daytime reality TV, which, to be fair, I'm not sure exists. But if it did, it would be like this-- something you know is rotting you from the inside, yet has enough of an appeal to hack some brain stems into consuming it regardless.
Seven Sons Farms Chocolate Milk
Leads with cocoa-- a strong, sourish / mature cocoa flavor seizes your tastebuds right away and takes you on a uniquely tasty journey that ends with a clean aftertaste, ultimately whetting your palate for another draw. Both under-sweet and under-salty, it's well balanced and affords the chocolate flavor the lion's share of the limelight. The only chocolate milk I've seen to date that has 'butter' as an ingredient-- I can't pick it out per-se, but bonus point for the novelty!
Amish Country Dairy Chocolate Milk
Fleeting upfront saltiness that sets the tone for the deliciousness yet to come. I absolutely love the (thin) texture to (high) creaminess ratio-- it drinks quickly but remains indulgent throughout. The cocoa flavor won't beat you over the head, but the cream flavor and its luxurious lithe-ness will.
Trader Joes Reduced Fat Chocolate Milk
The enjoyment peaks early on in the sip with the initial rush of cocoa and moderate sweetness-- but it quickly abates in favor of an intrusive stevia wave-- not quite sharp enough to call it a 'twang'-- but it wrests control of the flavor throughout the 2nd and 3rd trimester-- leaving you with an unsatisfying and slightly drying aftertaste.
Prairie Farms Lowfat UHT Chocolate Milk
Unremarkable but gets the job done-- it shades on the bland side of the ledger but at least has portability on its side being a shelf-stable product. There's a slight cooked-milk flavor that isn't particularly distracting-- and ultimately it drinks with facility and ends with a mild astringency. Middle of the road.
Ayrshire Farms Chocolate Milk
Very well-balanced flavor, in that it leads with chocolate, and the salty/sweet ratio is spot on and plays its supporting role perfectly. It drinks quickly-- I finished the entire cup before even recording any of the review-- which is always a good sign. It comes off as effortlessly delicious-- which seems congruent with its simple roots-- a very desirable quality that can't be faked.
Family Tyme Creamery Mocha Milk
More coffee than chocolate-- but that's certainly no complaint. As one who likes sweet coffee, this is enjoyable stuff with an honest caffeine kick before you can polish off the pint. There's a slight astringency in the afterglow that is noticeable but doesn't hamper the overall plus experience.
Family Tyme Creamery Cookies & Cream Milk
Well-imagined cookies & cream flavor with no shortage of sweetness to get its point across. The creamy non-homogenized base furthers the 'cream' part of C&C-- lending to an authenticity that many of its peers lack.
Family Tyme Creamery Chocolate Milk
Tasty initial maltiness that is carried through to the end by its gorgeous creamline body-- this is uniquely delicious and indulgent despite an under-reliance on chocolatiness.
Fairlife DHA Omega-3 Reduced Fat Chocolate Milk
Thinner texture and a nicely more 'lithe' drinking experience compared with the traditional Fairlife chocolate milk. The monk fruit sweetener has been dialed back to a more manageable level and really only hampers the aftertaste- and even that, only slightly.
Fairlife Reduced Fat Cookies N' Creme Milk
Very muted flavor-- has an almost diluted quality to it, and while it's largely unoffensive-- it's far from moving the needle in any positive direction. Initially smooth, it finishes with a chalky, drying lilt and predictably flat aftertaste. I'll concede that the packaging looks cool-- but if it's what's on the inside that counts, this doesn't belong among polite society.
Chobani Reduced Fat Lactose Free Chocolate Milk
Disturbingly thick, decidedly undersweet-- you almost have to chew it to get it down, which is a lot more work than the payoff is worth. I do appreciate the confidence to go low on the sugar, while not supplimenting with another kabuki sweetener. It's unique, and has a hefty protein kick, but the thickness-to-creaminess ratio is dissatisfyingly high, and I'm left with a dry mouth, full gut, and shattered dreams. Ok that's a bit dramatic.
TruMoo Moo & Improoved Lowfat Chocolate Milk
By definition, this run-of-the-mill nation-wide, mass-produced, low-fat chocolate milk should be a 5.0-- but somehow it feels criminal to call this average. Maybe my tastes and expectations have evolved slightly, maybe it's taken a turn for the worse. That said, it's super-innocuous, lightly sweet, and carries a slightly earthier than usual cocoa flavor that requires some effort to tease out.
The Mullen Dairy & Creamery Chocolate Banana Milk
Being a lover of innovation and fake banana flavor-- you'd think the confluence of these would be a match made in the heaven that is my lizard brain. It scores definite points for effort and novelty, but ultimately, it drinks like a liquid banana Runt-- not the worst thing by any stretch-- but the chocolate component is too overshadowed to register on the palate. Aesthetics-wise, it resembles something straight from a healthy bile-duct, but don't let that keep you from giving it a try if the above sounds remotely your speed.
The Mullen Dairy & Creamery Cookies & Cream Milk
A welcome more-mature CnC flavor here that is not hampered by an over-reliance on sweetness to get its point across. Accuracy over caricature is a appreciated in this application, and the flavor ages nicely from initial contact to lasting repose.
The Mullen Dairy & Creamery Chocolate Milk
Brightly cocoa-focused with a subtle homage to its grassy roots-- this is a powerful manifestation of what makes chocolate milk a pleasure to consume. The strong cocoa flavor is the star of the show, and the other aspects all play their supporting roles well-- particularly the sweetness, which remains thoughtfully in the background throughout.
Weigel's Peanut Butter Chocolate Milk
Loads of flavor supported by a competent whole milk base-- this is a dangerously easy (and remarkably efficient) way to take in 510 calories! The cocoa flavor is not lost in the peanut buttery goodness-- both are equally represented and not cartoonishly portrayed. Good stuff.