Probably should be out of scope, as it’s not really milk, it is a widely known drink in America. Thin, silky smooth, watery, sweet; still not a viable replacement for relatively average chocolate milk.
Maola By Marva Maid Chocolate 1% Lowfat Milk
There's something off about the texture— it’s fairly smooth but feels like it refuses to disperse naturally. Extremely light/gray, amply sweet but not very chocolaty. The sweetness has a fruity (grape-ish) undertone.
Coburn Farms Reduced Fat Chocolate Milk
Flavorful in a lot of the right ways— good representation of cocoa, malt, salt, cream, and sweetness— even a slight sour note that works well. Rather enjoyable to sip while contemplating whether the cattle rustling cow on the the label is a force for good, or a spiteful traitor to his own people.
Nestle Milo (Can)
Very attractive appearance (bright brown, chalky) but the taste comes off as fortified to a metallic extent. Like a chalky, grainy, mouthful of pennies with some cocoa flavor sprinkled in.
Food Lion Lowfat Chocolate Milk
Nice well-rounded chocolate milk with each flavor category easily identifiable. Smooth and easy to drink, above standard.
Nature's Touch Chocolate Milk
Cocoa flavor is a bit in the background, but the smooth and creamy flavor make up for it. Thickness much more warranted here than in the 1% version.
Nature's Touch 1% Low Fat Chocolate Milk
Slight fruity sweetness at first taste, and seemingly more vanilla than cocoa. The starchy thickness is a turnoff, however, with the lack of cream flavor it comes off as artificial.
Cocoa Metro Organic European Chocolate Milk
So brown it's almost red, almost too much flavor for its own good. Has an earthier cocoa taste which is nice once you get used to it, but the thickness makes you feel like you’re drinking dark chocolate cake.
Cocoa Metro Belgian Chocolate Reduced Fat Milk
Phenomenal cocoa flavor and strength, plenty of sweetness, salt, and creaminess to carry it through. Simply the BEST I've had thus far!
Castle Rock Organic Farms Cream Line Milk
Unable to mix the cream in (which was like butter) despite mixing and shaking until my arms gave out. What I could drink was nice, and I imagine it's great with the cream evenly distributed, but I couldn't achieve that without a blender (which I didn't have).
Hershey's Creamy Chocolate Flavored Milk Shake
Great cocoa flavor but also a relatively strong ‘marshmallow-y’ taste that is unavoidable once you recognize it. Very sweet and flavorful, if you love chocolate marshmallows, go out of your way to find this.
TruMoo Chocolate Lowfat Milk Calcium Plus
A fair bit saltier than other TruMoo products, but same lack of cocoa flavor. More salt than sweet, not necessarily a bad thing, but otherwise unmemorable.
Cub Chocolate Fat Free Milk
Unexciting, typical flavor profile of the big-jug chocolate milks. Nothing offensive, just enough to be ‘ok.’
Yup! Chocolate 1% Low Fat Ultra-Filtered Milk
Reminiscent of Fairlife in many regards, with its thin/smooth combination, noticeable cocoa flavor, and slight ‘uniqueness’ (not in a good way) to the sweetener. Decently potable lower-sugar and lactose free option if enjoyment is not your primary charter.
Kemps Reduced Fat Chocolate Milk
Much stronger cocoa flavor and less sweet than Kemps Swiss Style 1%. Has a hot chocolate-esque taste and chalky finish, both of which are far from offensive in this case.
Market Pantry Chocolate Fat Free Milk
Fruity sweetness, not a ton of chocolate involved. Thicker than you would expect for a fat-free milk.
Kemp's Swiss Style Chocolate Lowfat Milk
Nicely balanced, all major flavors present and well represented.
Hershey's Chocolate Lowfat Milk
Relatively flat cocoa flavor that feels a bit inauthentic. Did not deliver the same creamy/chocolaty punch that the UHT version had.
Organic Valley Good To Go Chocolate Lowfat Milk
Similar creamy/maltiness to other Organic Valley products but the taste is regrettable on this one. Very little sweetness, even less cocoa.
Deans Chug Chocolate Milk Shake
It’s like drinking pudding. Pudding that has decently strong chocolate flavor, but otherwise is a deluge of sugar and starch.